Benjamin David Van Buskirk

Benjamin David Van Buskirk tragically died on Saturday July 27, 2024. He was 17 years old.

Ben was born in St Louis, Missouri. He spent the first 7 years of his life in Lancaster, Pennsylvania and the remaining brief 10 years in Olathe, Kansas. He was raised along with his older brother Ty by Mark and Carrie Van Buskirk.

Ben came into the world quite prematurely and spent time in NICU before coming home. The running joke into his teens was that this was the only time in his life he showed up early instead of running late. He was a tiny and beautiful boy that couldn’t get enough hugs or snuggles from family. If a family member or pet was around, Ben was attached to them. His affection and care was constant. He kept this wonderful trait his entire life. His passions in life were present almost immediately. Ben had a deep love and connection to animals, passion for sports, craving for sweets he learned to charm anyone into providing to him, a relentless adoration of music, and a witty sense of humor he loved to deploy on anyone - at any time. He lived to make others laugh and smile!

Ben’s love and connections to his friends and family were deep and often all encompassing. But his relationship with his brother, Ty, was elevated above all others. Although three years apart, throughout childhood, the two often appeared as twins, inseparable. Even though the younger brother, Ben often took the lead in an effort to teach and protect his older brother who was learning to navigate life as autistic. Ben wouldn’t even sleep in his own bed and sought safety in Ty’s presence until middle school. Ben was Ty’s compass, always showing him the way. Ben proudly and selflessly served as Ty’s constant source of encouragement, endless source of love (sometimes suffocating), and reassurance. Ben’s deep love and connection with family and friends was incredibly authentic, unwavering, and loyal. He always greeted you with a warm embrace and illuminating smile, and never parted ways without a hug and expression of his love and gratitude. Ben’s family treasured his authenticity and courage to be himself. He was the first one in the family to crack a joke or invite everyone to play a game. Ben spent family time having long conversations with his dad while fishing, singing with his mom while he broke out dance moves that had her laughing, and countless hours gaming with his brother. He didn’t let a day go by without reassuring you of his love. He truly illuminated love and joy everywhere. What a bright light he was! Perhaps just too bright for this world.

From a very young age he spoke of caring for all creatures. It was this care inside him that led to such tight connections to animals of any size. He would find any animal or insect in trouble and would try to save them. Even if they lasted just a few hours he would truly mourn their loss. Countless numbers of funerals for creatures that passed are only eclipsed by the number of passionate celebrations of release for those he managed to save. Ben’s favorite animal was the simple turtle. His last big rescue was a huge turtle he found in the field next to his home. Ben walked in the door describing “the biggest turtle” and then brought in an enormous, disoriented turtle with leeches attached to him. Ben cleaned the turtle up, removed the parasites, and walked through a muddy field to return the turtle to water. Coming home forty-five minutes later covered in mud and sweat he was so happy and joyful. Feeling that joy his father couldn’t yell at him for making them 30 minutes late to an appointment.

Ben’s connection to animals was the tip of the caring iceberg. He connected with so many people by playing, watching, and talking about any sport. Baseball, soccer, basketball, and fishing were constant passions growing up and he later grew to love bowling and golfing. His passion for fishing grew and grew throughout his life. Despite his parents’ attempts to sway him to St Louis sports teams, Ben latched onto Philadelphia teams at 2 years old and that was it. Eagles, Phillies and 76ers were in his blood and stayed there. He did remain loyal to St Louis Blues hockey and kept the Cardinals his number #1A baseball team as he put it. Above all else was his love of the Eagles. This Eagles love was so strong he required a trip each year to catch a game and take in the city he felt most comfortable in. Several of Ben’s friends used the nickname “Philly” for him as it was a perfect fit, “The City of Brotherly Love”.

Ben most often expressed himself through his love of music. It was as though he was born with a song in his heart and felt compelled to share that song with so many. Ben’s taste in music, as in many other things, was inclusive and eclectic. He would be just as likely to be blasting Rod Wave or Snoop Dogg as he would be to be sitting back listening to The Beatles, dancing around the house to “Mr. Blue Sky” or making up a song with lyrics that felt right to him. Ben used music just like he did sports or humor - as a way to connect with others, share joy, and spread a sense of belonging.

It was in social settings where Ben flourished. He just loved if not craved to be around family and friends and had a natural ability to connect to people of all ages, cultures, and backgrounds. He truly was invested in learning how people were doing and who they were. He knew no strangers. His family would comment that you couldn’t go anywhere where Ben didn’t run into someone he knew or keep track of friends he would bring home. Beyond the casual friendship, Ben extended the hugs he grew up giving to his family to the close friends he made along the way. He made a point of telling those friends that he loved them - and made a point of making sure that they reciprocated that expression. That love and joy became contagious among his friends - soon all the guys were exchanging “I love you” when ending phone calls, even when Ben wasn’t present.

It's because of this and who Ben was, that his family was not surprised by his final actions on earth. Early Saturday morning July 27th, Ben and a close friend were driving home and witnessed an accident on the interstate. Ben yelled to stop the car, saying people in the car needed help. He ran to provide aid and was tragically killed after being struck in the process. Courage isn’t something that can be taught, it solely lives in the moment. Ben’s courageous spirit was present at the time of his death. Though his parents and brother wish he hadn’t chosen to do it, they simply understand that is who he was. He died as he lived, thoughtful, loving, and courageous. May his short yet meaningful life remind us all to live life with intention, purpose, compassion for others with a listening ear, a watchful eye, and loving heart.

Ben is survived by his parents, Mark and Carrie, his brother, Ty, and innumerable beloved aunts, uncles, and cousins.

He was preceded in death by his grandparents, Lanny and Maralee Van Buskirk and Tom and Carol Kosko, his uncle Jay Van Buskirk, and his cousin Michael.

In lieu of flowers, to best honor Ben’s memory, donations can be sent to the Eagles Autism Foundation. Click Here to donate online.

All are welcome to join the family for visitation on Monday, August 5th from 5:00 - 7:30 pm at the Penwell-Gabel Funeral Home, Olathe. In the spirit of Ben’s dislike for formal wear, please come as you are and represent Ben’s Philadelphia Eagles or any shade of pink.

A memorial service will follow at Grace Church -Olathe Campus, 17401 W 167th St., Olathe, KS, on Tuesday, August 6th at 3:00pm, followed by private inurnment in St. Louis so Ben can rest with his grandparents and beloved family.



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